Month: April 2019

The other day my dad said something that really got me thinking. It was something like, “pretty much every vampire story has already been done, you’re going to have to be really creative if you want to write vampire books.”

Which is true. Every story has already been written.

But, not by me.

There are no original plots. EVERYTHING has been done.

That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t still write mine.

It’s advice I think most of us have probably heard at some point, but it bears repeating:

Write your story anyway. There are hundreds of other vampire stories, or faery stories, or werewolves, or romances, or epic fantasy quest novels. But none of those is your story, written in your voice, with your unique perspective and values.

Write your story.

Always just write your story.

Don’t let all the great stories that are already out there scare you away — let them inspire you! Look at how much great stuff people are making! I’m going to go make great stuff too!

So let my unexpected truth bomb be your truth bomb, too. Go forth and make things!

**thanks, Dad!

 

 

Instead of getting overwhelmed by the bigness of the thing you want to do, just take the next small step.

Creative folk, those of us with big dreams and big plans for ourselves, its easy to get so excited by your idea that you want to rush out and change the whole world right now. And then instantly get discouraged and overwhelmed by how big that is, how far it is from where you currently are, that your momentum flags and dies. At least, if you’re me that’s what happens.

So instead of thinking about “I want to run my own creative business,” think about sending one email or crafting one blog post or art piece. Instead of thinking, “I want to be a self-published author,” think, “I’m going to write the next 500 words of this novel.”

Start small. One little thing after another little thing. Until one day you’re where you dreamed of being and you don’t even remember getting there.

I’m having a day. Not a bad day, but a day at loose ends, and day in which I feel all over the place. Unhappy in what I’m doing but not sure what I should be doing. I want to do something different now; I want to pour it all into my writing; I want to do something different for work while I build this writing career that feels like a dream.

It’s hard to know what’s best — the smart thing or the fuck it who cares it’s what I want to do no matter what thing.

It’s days like this when my belief that the universe has my back, and that the reality that I dream of already exists, feels foggier. It’s hard not to get discouraged on days like this. To just feel overwhelmed, not know where to start, and despair of ever getting anywhere from not starting anything.

But then I think of what I might have done if I’d just plodded along doing something every day for the last ten years up to now, and it makes me feel better about just plodding along now, doing what I know feels right, every day, even if it feels like nothing.

 

I really wanted to participate in CampNaNoWriMo this April. Mostly on principle, since the last few rounds of NaNos I have whiffed it, and I miss the camaraderie and spirit of it, and the writing habit. Above all, I’ve been missing the writing habit.

I didn’t have a project yet, really, although over the first couple of months of 2019 I’ve been working on an outline for my vampire novel. An outline I was really liking, too. I felt like I was finally solving some plot points that had always bothered me, figuring out some character motivations. And even though, three days before Camp NaNo started, I decided to scrap most of that outline and start the novel in a completely different way that had come to me in a sudden flash of inspiration, the point is that I started, and I was excited about it.

But I decided right from the get go, as I was filling out my Camp profile and project, that I was going to use the flexibility of the Camp NaNo session to set a goal that was ridiculously small. One that didn’t’ even feel worth it, it was so small.

My goal for April Camp NaNo 2019 is 500 words per day. Or, 15,000 words in total. 

That feels so small, dude.

As someone who is a perpetual A-student and teacher’s pet, it goes against my nature to not set a goal at “perfection”. NaNo is technically 50,000 words, therefore even though it’s Camp and you can set whatever goal you want I should be aiming for 50K because that’s the “right” way to do it.

Nevermind the fact that I have a full and busy life and writing 1,667 words per day is fucking hard around everything else that wants a piece of my time. I’m the perfect student and I’ll just have to find a way to hit the perfect goal. I’m sure I can get up two hours early every day without fail to accomplish ALL THE THINGS.

Dude. When will I learn that life doesn’t work that way?

Well, I’m trying to learn it now. Because I’m trying a new tactic — setting a goal that feels stupidly small, one that feels ridiculously easy to accomplish, too easy, pointless. So that when my life happens and my energy flags and chores crop up uninvited, I have the space to still hit that ridiculously small goal and get that hit of pride that hey, I did the thing I said I would do. I’m annoyed and stressed out over other annoying bullshit in my life today, but hey, I hit my writing goal. GO ME!

And that little hit of confidence will keep me going day after day. And it’s that consistency that will make things happen, not dreaming of big giant goals that you can’t hit and that drag you down with discouragement and depression.

Currently Reading: King’s Dragon by Kate Elliott; The Upside of Your Darkside by Todd Kashdan and Robert Biswas-Diener

Currently Watching: Season 7 of Star Trek Voyager; Forensic Files; The Gil Mayo Mysteries

Currently Writing: unnamed vampire novel, first draft